Jeepers Creepers

I have no luck with men.

My Uncle is dating a woman who has kids in their late twenties. I'm in my early twenties. At Thanksgiving I met her son who sat in the livingroom watching football. Didn't talk to anyone and left without saying anything. I didn't think anything of him. I come home and he has friend requested me on Facebook and got my number from my Uncle. He has a girlfriend. That message is from this guy.

He won't stop texting me.

He wants to hang out.

He grosses me out.

I had to ask him to leave me alone.

*puke.in.my.mouth.

The Liz Lemon Syndrome

"You are stunning... but you were stunninger with your long hair." A compliment.
Now if only my hair would grow back so I might win back the approval of boys. Do you know how many boys in my life have made similar comments?

1. "You look good, but why did you ruin something good?"

2. "You looked better with long hair."

3. "Did you cut your hair because you knew I liked your long hair?"
Because that's what women do, right? We destroy the physical appearances you love as a form of vengeance/punishment. Take that for never showing up on that date/calling/texting me back, but expecting me not to "date" anyone else! *snip, snip*

I don't need you to make me feel good about myself. I love wearing my hair short, and I shouldn't have to justify what makes me feel good about myself.

On a similar note...The other day I had coffee with a guy I've known for years. After a really great discussion he tells me, "This is why I could never date you-you scare me."

Why do I scare you? lolzzz: "you intimidate me" ...oh
"you're very intelligent and independent, and beautiful too." ...is that so?

If only I could go one way, ya know? Why do I make this simple life so complicated for the other gender? If I were just beautiful, boys would like me because I wouldn't make them feel stupid. If I were just intelligent, I would be ignored by boys and enjoy a solitary life with my cats. But smart AND beautiful? Whoa, whoa, whoa. What am I doing? WHAT AM I DOING?


I just want to be stunninger.

Existence Box

We all live in an existence box, an existence box, an existence box.

Follow Along

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Def OKCupid Poetry Jam

GIRLS ARE WHORES

Ahh, Facebook.

Pride & WTF

I took a chance when I decided to go out with a guy, Mr. B, who had once made a crude comment where he insinuated I was making my money from stripping. I thought to myself, "maybe he just has an odd way of flirting" or "he must get nervous and says the wrong things."
Why do we girls do this for guys? We should be screaming: REDFLAG REDFLAG
Instead, we opt to encourage them by giving them "chances" to be better people. We think, I can change this dude with my love.
No, no, and no. When the red flag comes up, run away screaming.

Mr. B and I went out. We had a nice time. He wanted to know more about me. He opened the door for me. He bought my drinks. He was different from all the guys prior because he seemed attentive and interested and seemed to listen. I liked him.

A month later we had sex. It was nothing special, but with practice, who knows, right?

The phone calls began to happen less and less.
He is late and, at one point, just never shows up to our date and never calls.

All signs point to IT'S OVER. You accept this, a little hurt, but you'll be okay.

Now, I feel as though the guys I meet are more interested in what my boobs look like than what I have to say. I tried casual and I can't casually date. The guy mentioned above? I totally liked him and wanted to get to know him more. I guess, in a way, I did get to know him more but in all the ways I didn't expect.

SIGNS YOU ARE DATING A CRAZY DUDE

1) When a guy doesn't call and ditches you frequently, you may think to yourself, "What am I doing wrong?" STOP. You have done nothing wrong. If he doesn't call and ditches you, all signs point to THIS GUY IS A LOSER. Break it off, move on. Right?

You then move to deleting the guy from your life. He is a flake. Why is your life any of his business now? You de-friend the guy on Facebook and he then immediately texts you with: "Of all the people, I would never think you would do this to me..." and sends a friend request on Facebook. This is the same guy who hasn't talked to you in a few days and left you waiting out in public on your date. Cool bro.

2) When you explain to the guy your feelings and he turns into the victim.

I have had several discussions with different guys about how I feel in our relationship. With the most recent guy, I explained how I cared about him, and that I felt he didn't share the same feelings. I opted to end the arrangement because I felt we wanted different things...I wanted more, he didn't want a relationship. I wanted to continue being friendly, no hard feelings. The guy then tells me that I "have a wall up" and that "I run away from him." Suddenly I am the reason he doesn't call back or flakes on everything? I thought telling someone you cared about them is like saying, heeeey sup, I tore this wall down, come on in.

3) This same guy also wanted a review of his sexual performance, and when I wouldn't tell him, decided that "he was just another guy to me" and I didn't care. SIGN: Telling me you got off thinking about me and want to know if you're different from my former sexual partners....uuuuh? You made me puke in my mouth, that's different.

4) In the middle of sex he says to you, "I don't want to get close to you." I'm just glad I got off before this was uttered into my ear.


I have the strange luck of meeting sad little boys.
I also believe in fairy tale endings and keep holding out for mine.

I wasn't asking you to be my boyfriend, I was trying to get to know you and get closer with the hopes that yes, maybe this would blossom into a relationship. I got to know you but not in the way I had hoped for and now I'm left feeling used and pathetic.

After OKCupid Hookup #2 with Bonus Ex-Drama

Dear Men,

If, in the past, we broke up: it was for a reason. Do not continue to message me a year later about how we should give it another go. No, we shouldn't, because you're the douchebag who fucked it up in the first place. Also, you're probably just upset about not getting any- so please go date someone and leave me alone.

If we fuck on the first date, it was probably because I was just looking for sex anyway. Therefore, you do not have to spoon-feed me the lies that dudes are supposed to tell chicks, like "I'm going to be really busy for the next month..." I get it. I'm not planning to be your fucking girlfriend. Be real for once. Fuck.

You do not need to buy Magnum condoms for your seven inch dick. I don't even know why guys do this.

AND CAN WE PLEASE JUST KEEP OUR GOD DAMN ERECTIONS FOR ONCE. I feel like no one told me about this phenomenon.

Also, I would still like an honest answer about whether or not "blue balls" is a real thing or just a masterfully used device to pressure women.

Thanks for the rage, bitterness, and unsatisfying sex.

Catch of the Day

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Halloween Slutz

Unfortunately, I now have a boyfriend. Though not technically a boyfriend, as we're not Facebook official and he says to "call it whatever you want, labels suck". Call it societal influence or maybe just my vagina crying out for much-needed attention, but I find myself having to rage on men less. Or maybe mostly, guys don't contact taken girls on OKCupid.

Today, and by today I mean yesterday because I've yet to sleep, is Halloween. I no longer understand what some people want. The same men expect women to be sexy, and then accuse them of being slutty for dressing up in revealing clothing with friends. I'm sure women would agree that they have the right to dress as they wish without harassment, but have no issue assuming some sort of promiscuity (as if there's any issue with that anyways) and sling insults when other women have fun.

And I give you Facebook.

I'm disappointed in my gender, too. Maybe "Je" has self esteem issues that cause her to lash out on other women, or maybe she's one of those people who agrees that slutty girls deserve to have terrible things happen to them.

All I know is that as long as women (and men too) perpetuate this bullshit, we'll never be equal, we will be judged, and we will never feel entirely safe.